lonely :|

My life from the outside seems perfect. I have so many people around me and yet i feel so alone. I have friends, but I know friends never be there with me along day, I have family but I feel like I don't. I feel lost within myself.  Even when i talk to friends, i nod and smile, but in my head i feel like i am a million miles away, an island of my own making. these days it pains me to smile because i know it is lie. Nobody seems to know me or understand the real me anymore. And my biggest problem is that i don't even know myself anymore.

Why do i feel so lonely? and how do i stop feeling this way? this sense of numbness is shattering me.